Sunday School: “She’s Got Issues” by Nicole Unice February 1,
2015
Insecurity
How did we,
such powerful, beautiful women, ever become so insecure? (76)
I had a hard time defining and security. It's a cloudy kind of word, with all kinds of associations and feelings hiding in it. It's abstract... They might not be able to find it – you know it when you see it! (76)
"An insecure woman is someone who talks with no opinion. She can expend an enormous amount of energy to avoid uncovering anything about herself. If she does give an opinion, she tends to pull it back or second-guess what she just said. I think she's someone who will sometimes joke about herself in a painfully self-deprecating way. When I'm around a woman like that, I get the feeling that she doesn't know who she is, or she doesn't like what she knows about herself. "(77)
It is almost laughable to ask if you struggle with insecurity because I believe we all do to a certain extent. So I invite you to take this assessment to discover how, why, and where your presents insecurity in your own life. (77)
[take quiz]
Insecure is the catchphrase for just about every issue one can face as a woman… Insecurity is like a mold in my kitchen: it's never welcome but it seems to crop up and all kinds of places. The difference is this: I would never let mold remain on my bread or in my refrigerator, yet so often we women readily accept insecurity like it's a normal part of life. (79-80)
Review your responses to the insecurity assessment. Are you uncomfortable? Do you wish some of them weren't true? Are you frustrated with some of the same issues you've had with appearance or approval since middle school continue to plague you today? Our emotions often to fire our logic! (80)
We know all the right things, but the reality is, believing these things is much harder than saying them. Hollow platitudes that to nothing except make us feel worst! (80)
Blogger Rachel Held Evans says "my insecurities keep me from participating in meaningful relationships, doing things that are out of my comfort zone, and learning from new perspectives." (80-81)
Without facing our issues head-on, we miss out on some of the richest gift life offers, like growth, love, and adventure. (81)
4 distinct areas of insecurity: appearance, relationships, approval, and achievement
If you answered mostly true to 3,4,5 appearance maybe a place of insecurity for you
-we can't even evaluate ourselves objectively…
If you answered mostly true statements 1, 2, 9, relationships may be a place of insecurity for you.
-I'm all of us there is a part of our hearts that desperately seeks to be understood, supported, and delighted in; a part that wants someone to cheer us when we are discouraged, calm us when we are frustrated, soothe us when we are sad; and this part of our hearts can never be fully satisfied by one flawed human. (83)
If you answer mostly true to 7,8,12, approval may be a place of insecurity for you.
-because we measure our worth by the admiration of the person whose approval we crave, we seek to do more and more of whatever earns their favor. And as we do, we often stray further away from the realness of who we are. (85)
If you answered mostly true to 6,10,11, achievement is a place of insecurity for you.
I had a hard time defining and security. It's a cloudy kind of word, with all kinds of associations and feelings hiding in it. It's abstract... They might not be able to find it – you know it when you see it! (76)
"An insecure woman is someone who talks with no opinion. She can expend an enormous amount of energy to avoid uncovering anything about herself. If she does give an opinion, she tends to pull it back or second-guess what she just said. I think she's someone who will sometimes joke about herself in a painfully self-deprecating way. When I'm around a woman like that, I get the feeling that she doesn't know who she is, or she doesn't like what she knows about herself. "(77)
It is almost laughable to ask if you struggle with insecurity because I believe we all do to a certain extent. So I invite you to take this assessment to discover how, why, and where your presents insecurity in your own life. (77)
[take quiz]
Insecure is the catchphrase for just about every issue one can face as a woman… Insecurity is like a mold in my kitchen: it's never welcome but it seems to crop up and all kinds of places. The difference is this: I would never let mold remain on my bread or in my refrigerator, yet so often we women readily accept insecurity like it's a normal part of life. (79-80)
Review your responses to the insecurity assessment. Are you uncomfortable? Do you wish some of them weren't true? Are you frustrated with some of the same issues you've had with appearance or approval since middle school continue to plague you today? Our emotions often to fire our logic! (80)
We know all the right things, but the reality is, believing these things is much harder than saying them. Hollow platitudes that to nothing except make us feel worst! (80)
Blogger Rachel Held Evans says "my insecurities keep me from participating in meaningful relationships, doing things that are out of my comfort zone, and learning from new perspectives." (80-81)
Without facing our issues head-on, we miss out on some of the richest gift life offers, like growth, love, and adventure. (81)
4 distinct areas of insecurity: appearance, relationships, approval, and achievement
If you answered mostly true to 3,4,5 appearance maybe a place of insecurity for you
-we can't even evaluate ourselves objectively…
If you answered mostly true statements 1, 2, 9, relationships may be a place of insecurity for you.
-I'm all of us there is a part of our hearts that desperately seeks to be understood, supported, and delighted in; a part that wants someone to cheer us when we are discouraged, calm us when we are frustrated, soothe us when we are sad; and this part of our hearts can never be fully satisfied by one flawed human. (83)
If you answer mostly true to 7,8,12, approval may be a place of insecurity for you.
-because we measure our worth by the admiration of the person whose approval we crave, we seek to do more and more of whatever earns their favor. And as we do, we often stray further away from the realness of who we are. (85)
If you answered mostly true to 6,10,11, achievement is a place of insecurity for you.
Insecurity is
related to the word snare in scripture… If your foot is caught in a snare, the
more you struggle, the tighter the snare becomes… in Psalm 25:15, David writes
"my eyes are ever on the Lord, for only he will release my feet from the
snare." (87)
Scripture points out that the only way to be truly released is by focusing our attention on God. (87)
Our love of the beautiful, our deep desire for meaningful relationships, our hopes that we will excel in our work, our desire for approval – these are God-created experiences and desires! It's often the priority we give these things in our hearts that leads to our disappointment, disillusionment, and deep insecurity. (87-88)
We do not come by her insecurities easily, and we do not move away from them quickly. The growth required to finally rest in security and peace deep inside ourselves takes work. (88)
What if we begun to think of our insecurities not a shameful places to hide but as opportunities to see God working in our lives? When we begin to understand how her insecurities work in our minds, we begin to see just where we need God's healing touch or transforming confrontation. (90)
Because no matter what your age, no matter how deep those insecurities run, no matter what the circumstances are that created these shaky places – God is able. He is a miracle worker. He specializes in situations that seem bleak, and people the world calls goners, and in cemetery places of the soul. He is a life giver in every sense of the word – and you were never outside of his grasp. Every place of insecurity in your life; every situation where you find yourself paralyzed or shaky, every circumstance or season that makes you wonder if you are good enough: these are the places where God does his best work. (91)
Scripture points out that the only way to be truly released is by focusing our attention on God. (87)
Our love of the beautiful, our deep desire for meaningful relationships, our hopes that we will excel in our work, our desire for approval – these are God-created experiences and desires! It's often the priority we give these things in our hearts that leads to our disappointment, disillusionment, and deep insecurity. (87-88)
We do not come by her insecurities easily, and we do not move away from them quickly. The growth required to finally rest in security and peace deep inside ourselves takes work. (88)
What if we begun to think of our insecurities not a shameful places to hide but as opportunities to see God working in our lives? When we begin to understand how her insecurities work in our minds, we begin to see just where we need God's healing touch or transforming confrontation. (90)
Because no matter what your age, no matter how deep those insecurities run, no matter what the circumstances are that created these shaky places – God is able. He is a miracle worker. He specializes in situations that seem bleak, and people the world calls goners, and in cemetery places of the soul. He is a life giver in every sense of the word – and you were never outside of his grasp. Every place of insecurity in your life; every situation where you find yourself paralyzed or shaky, every circumstance or season that makes you wonder if you are good enough: these are the places where God does his best work. (91)
[WATCH VIDEO]
When we run to Christ for security, we find a hope that is a "strong and trustworthy anchor for our souls." Hebrews 6:19 (98)
Let us fix our eyes on Jesus the author and perfector of our faith. Hebrews 12:2
Without understanding the benefits of our relationship with Jesus, we are fundamentally and secure. Romans 12:2 says "let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think." Every time you feel ashamed, unforgiven, or not worth God's love, repeat a verse you've learned. God's word is a healer, a transformer, and a re-creator of our hearts and minds. We just have to do the work of getting that Word in. (99)
1) Christ offers forgiveness from sin– Isaiah 53:11 – by his knowledge my righteous servant will justify many, and he will bear their iniquities.
2)
Christ offers freedom from guilt – Galatians 5:1 – it is for freedom that
Christ has set us free.
-security in Christ creates the freedom to actually be changed, to be transformed into a woman who acts, feels, and thinks differently because of God in her life. It's futile trying to change people by shaming them… We are only transformed by love (101)
-security in Christ creates the freedom to actually be changed, to be transformed into a woman who acts, feels, and thinks differently because of God in her life. It's futile trying to change people by shaming them… We are only transformed by love (101)
3)
Christ offers eternal life – John 17:3 – and this is the way to have eternal
life to know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, the one who you sent to
earth.
4)
Christ offers a continual relationship with God –
5)
Christ leaves the gift of the Holy Spirit – Ephesians 1:13 and when you
believed in Christ, he identified you as his own by giving you the Holy Spirit,
whom he promised long ago.
-each of us must find our own way to combat our unique brand of insecurity with the reality of God's promises. (105)
-read the two paragraphs on page 107 about secure women.
-each of us must find our own way to combat our unique brand of insecurity with the reality of God's promises. (105)
-read the two paragraphs on page 107 about secure women.
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