Summer Service Project - Day 1

The other day I was flipping through an old journal from college and was reminded of a time when I really struggled with what it means to follow Christ. Like many of you, I grew up in a Christian home. I don’t really remember what it’s like to not be saved. I remember sitting in Olympians doing what I was supposed to to earn greenbacks to get some candy at the end of the night. In Olympians, we had to recite some pledges, a verse and a song to get a devotional book. You could earn medals if you completed certain tasks like church attendance, christian service, and bringing your Bible, to name a few. Being spiritual was very much tied to the things I did.

When I got to youth group, things changed some. We didn’t get immediate rewards for all of our good behavior, but we were encouraged to read our Bibles and pray daily, to be pure, to reach out to others through serving.

When I got to Bible college, I was met with a new set of expectations and requirements for being spiritual. Going to chapel so many times a week, attending church regularly, being involved in ministry, all while attending Bible classes throughout the week.

At some point, I got overwhelmed with it all. I can’t live up to those expectations. As much as I try, I fail at reading my Bible daily. Sometimes I’m selfish and don’t always want to love and serve others. I watch tv shows that I probably shouldn’t. Even though I know God loves me, some days I feel unlovable. I drive too fast (almost) all the time. I can’t live up to the expectations that others have placed on me or that I have put on myself.